


Only One You Need

by jngkey



Category: SHINee
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Roommates/Housemates, Boys In Love, Boys Kissing, Love, Love Confessions, M/M, Roommates, True Love, Yaoi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-29
Updated: 2019-04-29
Packaged: 2020-02-09 13:25:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,676
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18639001
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jngkey/pseuds/jngkey
Summary: It was a thing they had been arguing about ever since high school, who would need who in the future, and Kibum had finally lost, he needed Jonghyun more than ever.





	Only One You Need

Life had been a little bit more put together for Jonghyun than Kibum. He had his own place and Kibum just got kicked out of one. Kibum wondered why he was in this predicament, struggling when he was a lot smarter than Jonghyun, especially when they were in high school, but he realized that was beside the point.

 

Kibum needed Jonghyun more than ever. He had a job but had no money —his shitty job wasn’t good enough to provide him with funds to live on his own— and he had nowhere else to go.

 

“I’ll pay the gas and light bill for now,” Kibum said with a promising look in his eye, “But I promise to go half on rent when I get a better job.”

 

“You’re serious?” Jonghyun snickered, not at Kibum’s situation, but at the fact that he was there, in his kitchen, begging to stay in his apartment. He actually couldn’t believe it.

 

“Yes!” Kibum widen his eyes.

 

“Alright,” Jonghyun shrugged, then smiled, clasping his hands together and leaning on the kitchen table, towards Kibum across from him. “You can stay here, but first, let me hear you say it.”

 

Kibum blinked a few times. Jonghyun played entirely too much, so he wasn’t sure whether to take him seriously or not, but there was this daring look in his eye that never left, making him feel like he wasn’t joking.

 

“Say... what?”

 

“Say how much you needed me before I needed you,” Jonghyun smirked.

 

"Are _you_ being serious right now?”

 

“Say it!” Jonghyun laughed and leaned further, almost at the edge of his seat.

 

Kibum rolled his eyes, remembering where all of this came from. It was a thing they had been arguing about ever since high school, who would need who in the future, and Kibum had finally lost.

 

Kibum lifted out of his seat slowly, forearms at the center of the table as he met face to face with Jonghyun, noses almost touching. He winked, too much pride to admit such a thing, “Kick rocks.”

 

 

-

 

 

Kibum eventually told Jonghyun how he got kicked out of his other place. He seemed upset whenever he talked about it, but he continued to speak on it, mentioning the memories he created at the house. Jonghyun wondered why. Kibum had been living with him for about a month and he thought he was happy. He seemed grand, but he came off contradictive, as if he missed the other place too.

 

“...Would you ever go back if you had the chance?” Jonghyun asked, wanting to bite his tongue off. He wanted Kibum to enjoy living with him so he wouldn’t even consider going back to the other place if it was an option. He also wanted to know where really Kibum’s head was at.

 

“Nah,” Kibum sighed, hugging his knees into his chest and Jonghyun’s face sort of lit up, “There were some fun moments, but It’s toxic there. Isn't my thing.”

 

“I guess needing me has always been your thing then.” He teased.

 

Kibum scuffed playfully. “Why are you like this?”

 

“I _just_ wanna hear you say it.”

 

“I just want _you_ to shut up.”

 

Jonghyun laughed.

 

 

-

 

 

Jonghyun felt content and pleased that he was the one needed. Kibum slept on his couch, but sometimes climbed into his bed in the middle of the night. He curled right into him, without a single word, and Jonghyun somewhat had no words either. There was a little voice in his head telling him that Kibum belonged there.

 

Sometimes they watched movies and cooked together. Sometimes they flirted and mocked each other. All of it made Jonghyun feel so alive, but he couldn't handle it. They were too intimate for Kibum to feel so close, yet so far away.

 

One night Jonghyun wanted to make a move. He wanted to do it for a while since they’d been living together for four months. As they were in the kitchen and Kibum was making dinner, he had this authentic glow that Jonghyun just couldn’t get over. At that point he was so mesmerized that he wasn’t even sure how to execute.

 

“Can you hand me the salt?” Kibum slightly turned around from the stove to look back and paused when he noticed Jonghyun staring at him. Jonghyun had done this multiple times before, this time he just so happened to not be able to snap out of it quick enough.

 

“What?” Kibum asked, lips curling up into a confused smile.

 

“Nothing,” Jonghyun said quickly, then going silent as he grabbed the salt from behind him on the table and handing it to Kibum.

 

 Kibum pursed his lips, noticing something off. He turned off the stove and crossed his arms at a now down casted eyed Jonghyun. “Spit it out.”

 

“It’s nothing for rea—”

 

“Jonghyun.”

 

Jonghyun looked up, realizing Kibum’s stubborn expression and sighed softly, “I can show you better than I can tell you,”

 

Kibum relaxed and his eyes went soft, stood there like his feet were glued to the ground. Jonghyun took that as a sign to do exactly what he said, reaching up to cares Kibum cheek before he leaned in, pressing his lips firm against Kibum’s.

 

“We can’t,” Kibum whispered against Jonghyun’s lips.

 

“Why can’t we?” Jonghyun whispered back, begging as he pressed a little closer to him.

 

Kibum sighed and wrapped his arms around Jonghyun's neck, pulling his face back, “What we have is good now and I don’t want it to be ruined,”

 

He felt like a knife sort of poked at his heart because it was true, what they had was good.

 

But it could be so much better.

 

Jonghyun took a few steps back and Kibum’s let his arms slide off of him. “I'm happy the way we are. Don’t take it as a bad thing. I just...“

 

“I-I get it.” Jonghyun’s voice cracked.  

 

 

-

 

 

They hadn’t been the same ever since. They didn’t talk as much and spend as much time together like they use to and Jonghyun felt like a part of him was lost, Kibum being his missing puzzle piece.

 

In his defense, it wasn’t his fault. Kibum all of a sudden became busy with his “friends” or he went out on these stupid dates. It hurt like hell to see Kibum stick himself in the wrong shapes. They belonged together. Jonghyun thought Kibum was blind or maybe fighting it. What they had was beautiful, dazzling to the point where it might just explode.

 

 As it should, Jonghyun thought.

 

One day Jonghyun unknowingly opened the front door for one of Kibum’s dates. He stood on the porch all dressed up, smelling like cologne and with a heart-shaped box of candy in his hand.

 

Jonghyun pretended to be fine, acted unbothered as he watched Kibum rush out of the house.  As soon as the door slammed in his face, leaving him to an empty space while he heard the engine of a car startup, knowing the man he loved was about to drive off with prince charming, whoever the fuck he was, Jonghyun thought. He couldn’t keep composure, he wanted to blow, explode.

 

He went to the local bar and put a few drinks in his system, trying to get over the fact that Kibum wanted to be with somebody else.

 

He was decomposing, falling off of a creaky bar stool as a woman had approached him, picking him up from one of his falls, asking if he were alright. He ended up giving her a compliment and she decided to stick around. He hadn’t known how much of a flirt he was until he ended up wasted and bringing the woman back home. At the moment he could’ve sworn she could be the apple of his eye, but the next morning, she didn’t seem all that grand. It was the liquor talking.

 

  

When the woman left Jonghyun peaked out of his room and found Kibum balled up on the couch crying, soft mewls sounding like the melody of a desolate song. As Jonghyun watched from behind the door an unwanted feeling of guilt formed in his chest. He wanted to take it back, he thought Kibum wanted to be with somebody else.

 

Jonghyun’s throat went dry as he stepped out of his room. “We didn’t…”

 

“…You did,” Kibum lifted his head up, red in the face with tear-stains under his eyes, "You don't have to lie to me."

 

“ _You_ lied to me.” Jonghyun protested, “You said you were happy the way we are.”

 

“I am!"

 

"Then why are you crying?"

 

Kibum went silent for a long time. Jonghyun sighed and got up from the couch, but Kibum grabbed his hand, stopping him, realizing that he couldn’t let his jealousy or pride get the best of him. He still needed Jonghyun. He quickly rose up from the couch, meeting Jonghyun’s gaze as he tried to blink away the rest of his tears. “I should’ve said this a long time ago, but it’s useless now…”

 

“Just say it.” Jonghyun grabbed Kibum’s other hand, feeling like electricity as their fingers laced and squeezed together. Kibum chewed in his bottom lip before letting everything out at once.

“I’m sorry for never telling you how much you mean to me, _I’m sorry_ for never telling you how much I need you, _I’m sorry_ for forcing myself on someone else when I knew I was in love with you, _I’m sorry._ _I’m_ —”

 

Jonghyun crashed his lips into Kibum’s.

 

Their lips slid and pressed against each other with so much force and so much passion. There was nothing that needed to be said. Kibum had finally said it. They were finally closed without a gap, finally close enough to fill the empty spaces, complete each other like they should’ve done a long time ago.

 

“Don’t be.” Jonghyun pulled back, whispering against Kibum's lips, “We all make mistakes.”

 

“I made a huge one,” Kibum wrapped his arms around Jonghyun, squeezing him. ”You’re the only one I need,”

 

“The only one you need.” Jonghyun nodded, squeezing him tighter.

**Author's Note:**

> this was for #jjongsmonth and because it is my favorite song on POET | ARTIST.  
> the fic doesn’t have the same meaning as the song because the song is a little sad, but i tried to incorporate some of the lyrics.
> 
> if you've seen this before i uploaded this a couple of weeks ago and then deleted it along with my other works because i was going through...something. but now im better and its back.  
>  
> 
> feedback would be really nice :)


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